Sunday, September 28, 2008

Feeling Blue

I went to church today and my eyes watered as I sang. I remembered one of the last times I sang that song. Tears rolled down my face as I played my guitar. I couldn't speak or sing, so I put my head down and kept playing. Today didn't go that way. My eyes watered and I stopped singing. When I felt I could, I did. My mom has been gone for six years now. The official date is tomorrow, but she died on a Sunday evening. Ovarian cancer took my mother in six months from diagnosis to death. I've been able to move forward, but I still miss everything about her. I miss her hugs, her voice, her laughter. I miss the blessing that I got every time I said hello and goodbye. I really miss her food. There's nothing in the world that makes you feel like an orphan as losing your mother. Skyraven Francisca R. 1942 - 2002

2 comments:

Jen said...

Skyraven,

What a wonderful tribute to your mother. I have tears in my eyes after reading your post. It makes me want to go and give my own mom a hug and tell her how much I appreciate her. I hope maybe in knowing that you have shared a connection with others in your music and writing that that may bring you some comfort when you are feeling down.

Skyraven said...

Jen,

Thanks for coming to visit. Please hug your mom for me! I was on the phone with a friend and I started crying as I told her how much I missed Mami's hugs. They were warm and soft and protective. I felt so safe and that no one could hurt me as long as I was in her arms. There's really nothing in the world like Mami's hugs. Music and writing do help, but her legacy to me was a devotion to church. Not so strangely enough, I don't miss her as much when I'm at church. Thanks for visiting and come back soon!